So, what do I know....

 

If i drop dead today...All of life all of mine  what's the real one identity above all: Well, more than anything else, that one cannot be two personhoods in one person.

That does not mean you 'hate' the 'sinner' it merely means you have to decide which of two persons you are.

You - no one, can be a Pilgerite,

 and  either take the money of, or have any kind of meaningful 'relationship', with the whole complex SOCIAL complex around, the money men,  even their actual brothel keepers - most of London is...

And the woman - my own Katrina, if they are one thing - international humanist fairly pacifist according to their book cover. And even books. If they sell out for some big pot of cash. Sadly that is in fact the personhood they ALWAYS were.

EVERYone in the 1980s .. except about maybe 3 or 5% knew pornography is bad.  Nope, errata,  almost everyone...  some of us (80s) had porn focused friends - more the kind of really seedy occasional gathering of men for in-crowd fun nights where there would be semi hooker porn stars present, hookering later on after a few drinks....  we would sort of nod along with the rare men like that in lost approval, but we would never join them. It  was simply over a line. 99% knew where the simple line was of gathering to watch or pretend friend women hired in to pretend to be happy being objectified ..plus...

 

Unfortunately the internet came along and as was always the case it has the circuitry of the American Constitution which allowed also, as well as  essential Free Speech sunlight, freedom to live off one of the worst drugs: pictures of naked women.

It's funny really when one listens to American so called intellectuals like Harris  - and many many more of the international broadcasters who spiv the system, they actually  entirely ignore this surely massive thing IN America: if the internet as was said maybe 15 years ago is  maybe 40 or 50%  pornography, it is  - was for sure...mainly American men consuming it... warped by it!

Yet one hardly ever hears anyone in fact almost never, speak of that fact.

And the 99% of us whom in the 80s, 90s,  would never dream of going along with the 1% to their seedy nights in some sports hall in Watford or Crawley and i am sure many places in between,  ended up 20 years later having ... being... warped by pictures of these events all fake of course...

SO you have to simply say you are for it or not.

And what do we have a pornographer king is speaking now to your children via Tateland...

And all the 'authorities' can ever more do is focus on child perversion porn quite rightly  but no one says stop.... 

And you have some silly girlwoman on radio 4 Boxing day  employed, paid by the BBC who will be texting all her so called educated friends later on " i got to say 'Pornhub' on the BBC"

As this tragically awful woman would have a interestingly in that awful year 2016 in her 'manistream' so called art using the words 'anal sex' 5 or 6 times...

    

what is 'anal sex'?  despite (it was hilarious listening to Evan Davies a few years ago as the results of the first national census to include sexual bias,  announce the ...data.... you could hear it in his voice " well we all know its maybe 10% ....  thats strange it.. the actual population.. report it is still only a  pretty small minority of a few percent)

despite...what exactly? I don't think there are words for Disneyfying what adults still do with one another the great majority..

But what is 'anal sex'...?  well one thing is for certain is  that unless one is in the few percent of men who in a rightly free society find their human touch, even 'love' via same sex conjugation,   it is not 'sex' for 50% of our population, the woman. She has no sex organs, no  erotic zones, no desire-juice membranes in her bottom.

ahhhahhhh i hear: theres a definate thrill in bumhole fiddlin...

Just like farm animals (no disrespect to them or anyone else)  when a heterosexual man is going through long periods of 'stress' - the Mammon's military industrial complex whole mad world of turbo capitalism / consumerism brought to us from the 80s...or even existential attack regarding his children or identity - the real one..... sometimes one - i should imagine most men at some point,  may   discover a kind of weird anaesthetic thing around his back passage... in fact playing with it is not much different than an anaesthetic drink of something to change ones 'mood'... escape... 

Farm animals under real stress - be it terrible noise from machinery continually on, or extremely cramped conditions   sometimes can be observed doing stress-response sexy things...

All the above quite hard to put in inclusive everyone is free language...

But one thing for sure - it's not sex for the woman...

And you pop onto Pornhub you will find rather a  lot of   women's bottoms being used for something that isn't sex for them, and isn't really either for most men...

Anyway...   what do i know - sitting on the fence will eventually spear you up your bum fatally.

And your world of Pornhub if its looked at reasearchedly you will find that it all escalates to mainly being about sticking it in the bottom...  which i don't  even call sex. (we did know this in the 80s! - it was on a par with doing it with a sheep .. obviously not the real thing) 

Either you think pornography is a wonderful full liberating new welcome frontier or you think its a disastrous turn of events which leads millions - i bet more than half! of men in their 20s  constantly suffering terrible compulsions that they cannot escape from and also leave them as drained as any crack pipe once the thrill has gone... almost worse at least on the crack pipe you may have some original creative new thought. Though myself lucky to have given up any 'mind altering' habits except real hard life, 35 years ago... i know one thing for certain, mind altering stuff is at least slightly engaging with the now  and seeking to sort of alter it.... pornography  is engaging with NOTHING. It is only one way - sucking humanity out of the user... 

There is no midway or compromise.

So, the rest - that which i hope is the actual identity of a younger person - if the porn hasnt entirely sucked the identity out of everyone around them

(and silly him in his Che t shirt merely pimps some absurd new man version of it being something to brag about  - its tragic - as we! then.. 80s... knew that we needed to grow up and modify the generation above us' behaviour...nope... they all lost their actual minds..he had a great one, once...)

...  poor things no one told them: you cannot be both....  a Pilgerite and also around the ... (bourgeois construct as it became about what THEY - at first the men...put in their mouths....   i am quite sure around the time of the Ancient Greeks plenty of fine minds realised that https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Epicurus really was a  bit limited..

And anyway all that matters is the cultural construct of the NOW...  35 years ago  anyone who made life about sticking fancy things in ones gob which is all epicureanism became... or rather revved up then via the 'foodie' movement ... that won..i know when i lost...

(" for some years io cannot even say and be LISTENED to " food is fuel...only...ideally nutritious and vitamin rich and not full of bad stuff but to me it is only fuel.."...astonishing the amount of times i have said that and it is impossible that anyone ever remembers it as...my identity.... except eating is NOT any identity

 its merely a mundane necessity...)

But 'politics' even if Britolish are post political - which means dead.... cos life has unfortunately always been political ever since agricultural surpluses created surpluses  with which to play power politics even if its within your backstreets...

either you are for egalitarianismishness... or for excesses.. theres no in between.   

In between hurts you... one side of the road or the other... in The Road you may as well be in Mr Mccarthy's awful book... dead.

But above all, reading good books is a box of  PAndoras Boxs...

And there are not enough lids in all the world, once a few are opened

I think modern society is only one of three choices except the choosing is out of our hands: you are either among the maybe majority just lost sheep ... via rubbish tv and parents with no wisdom ever to share (they kindof know some but darent utter it); you read some good books and you are either on the side of Ivan..or on the side of Ivan's  concentration camp gaolers... there is only a life of hurtstaying in nomans land 

Usually self harm of one form or other. There are many forms of course.

But all this 'sides' - for a decade but expsecially the last 6 or 7 years of the awful thickest minds in history from J Haidt to Jordan but then all your childmen Konstantin Kisin all of them...ALL!

A great women with a good platform - Oxford Uni authority researching REAL 'science' in 1999 if my memory is accurateish... Dr Susan Greenfield  came over the wireless as i was for some months sat working then a lot on my super trendy small screen laptop - an 11 incherish...

" looking into small screens our research has found makes you feel REALLY REALLY SHIT"  

Feeling a bit shit  - about life humanity politics identity everything...i listened and thought " damn me i cannot KNOW if she is right but it would explain something a bit weird.."

And  the small screen broken or at least i listened and more or less from then kept off small screens... 

If i know anything, i know she was and still is right...

Myself i only use small screens occasionally - almost always first thing in the morning (the shittinessitis in them can be washed out if outdoors ideally walking for the afternoon or otherwise not using them at all ... ) 

And i only listen/watch but mainly listen to the occasional PROGRAM - i never interact with a screen at night.... if as is the case 3 years especially in the winter its too cold to really read a book  - hands have to be above the duvet ... i just have a quick look for some saneish voice...

but there is no half way.... that i discovered years ago: small screens or any screen interaction - email or anything...at night after maybe tea time..make you feel shit and do mess up years of great sleep auto-habit  

And 99.5% of the time i keep to that... basically only a genuine real emergency makes me break that habit..

the definition of small screen making you feel shit is that they make any  'normal' human fizziness feel like the end of the world...

oh yes i forgot ... 

so we are ...not 'divided' into two sides of argument/ politics/ even family.... we are made to wrongly feel shit by the main 'communication' device of the last 15 years....  unless you know exactly what it is: something that will NEVER allow you to feel nice...

so an occasional tool to set up face to face meetings or if you know someone really well to share occasional wisdoms to bolster them figuring the world ..

otherwise there is only one word: detante...  in the 80s 90s... a great word...  but implicit - the context... everyone alive knew what it meant HARD WORK .. figuring strategies to go forward.

Unfortunately those two sides - the PIlgerite or the user... are so cold warrior, that yes hard work is required...

Very hard so hard one ,may as i did decide to retire behind my wall .. wrong way of putting it. Thirty years ago i knew  that in the cities - especially so called capitol cities, and London the sadly new-wonkiest of the lot.... 

well how do you put it? 

spivvery ... the spivs everyone knew were dangerous... flash cars...flash everything...flash restaurants

spivs ruin everything...  especially sane conversation about the rest of the world beyond their sad small minded spivvery..

But London became the centre for them  - i know as io still meandered other cities for my work none of which went spiv anything like as much as London of the mid 90s...

So, there is only half decent books...

With half decent books inside us we are one side of that fence...

sitting on it never works.

And then.... if anyone had said to me or any sane person i knew in the 80s that the vudu quacks would so so 'take over'  i would have said dont be daft or in fact as we had so little knowledge of their work in USA we would have thought such to be the words of a real madman ...

All i know though is the limited minds of even a great effort i have to say!!!

(i smiled when he got to him in the last section i havent before seen this mans ok work...) 

" and then i realised that Eckhart Tolle is using the same extremely pernicious  long understood dodgiest psyops nasty strategies..." i didnt think he would draw the line....   as the Tolles became of course conman 2.0 ...so so so much more subtly multi connite.... an industry based on some far more complex software but always the same one underlying  flawed way of Bee...ing

False friend false "hiuman" .....whatever....

Just a simplistic way to manipulate other humans into one way or other coghing up some cash....  rather than doing the hard work to cleaning lady or make something real.... or write some authentic truth

(we all get sucked into the spiv world i nearly did mid 20s ... lucky escape i  couldnt swim strongly enough to get to their side of the riverbank and after a few years floundering midstream was washed back up on the sore i did always know inside me safer and at least not based on her muddy swamp bank,... so ikt may even be partly random if we are undercurrented back to the side of the bank we Pilgerite belong to.... but the journey is horrid!!! ,)

Great stuff....except for one problem: it is NOT the more televangical .. even Brand or the rest of them who get some (highly produced) traction...

by definition someone making good documentaries largely based on what he finds online - those who rise to a few million subscribers... or views..

misses the point.... sadly... especially as was easy enough to see 2021 ...  but it started 15ish years ago....

 hundreds of thousands of ordinary men and mainly women who... didnt want to be a cleaning lady.... adopted the same tragically flawed approach ..in THEIR SMALL CIRCLES

see if i can use these same easy money principles (BUT THEY NEVER SPOKE OF MONEY JUST 'RELATING') 

it is everywhere... flooded The Marches slowly from 2010ish....all over the SW  everywhere 

it is so sad.

there are only two states of being: either one side of the river or the other. One side you build your boathouse on or with wood thats the real honest simple stuff - not at anyone elses expense... the other side, it is all a slight con..

even a slight con leaves the CONNER... kindof messed up and sad....

only detente works... i bit....     which is always based on some 'truth and reconciliation' 

Always...

That's all being "human" is